Finally I got the nerve up to end it with that boy I was dating. It was a bad situation and I should have never gotten myself involved in the first place. He was without a doubt the meanest person I have ever met in my entire life. He would always do things to purposely hurt my feelings. I've never in my life been straight punched in my face by a guy. I've never had a guy threaten my life. And to think I put up with all of it hoping and wishing someday he would change. But the sayings true, you cant teach an old dog new tricks. I will never again in my life put myself in that situation where I am scared of my own boyfriend. Like I've always said, I know I don't deserve the best, but I do deserve better than that. My whole life I've always wondered how in the world abused women always go back to their lovers. But now I know. I see where they are coming from and because of that I am so much more understanding. This is another reason why I want to go into law and become a prosecuting attorney.. I want to help. Give back to the community for all the times I've been helped by those that love me.
Now that I broke up with him for good I feel so good. I feel like I can sleep okay at night knowing that everything IS going to be okay. I know what it is to truly fear someone that claims they love you, I never saw that one coming at all. I am very thankful for all my friends that are here for me to listen to me when I feel like I need to talk. They have my back and I could not be any luckier to have such great friends. I am sooo cheerful. I am ready for the holidays. I am ready for it to snow. I am ready to get my life back. I gave him all his stuff back so its doneeee. I want it to snow so I can go dance in it, that would make me thrilled.
I could go on and on about B and say how bad of a person he is but I'm not going to waste my time. He was going nowhere in life and was going to use me to fall back on, when he told me that I should have known right away. But its all said and done with and its the weekend and I'm ready to have some fun!
let it snow, we can make snow angels <3
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2 comments:
You better be fucking joking about him punching you in your face because I will kill him
This is the first chance I've had to read your blog.
First, let me just say that I, too, went through alot of what you are experiencing. The late teens and early 20s just plain suck.
But, it does get better. You do kinda chill out. Things do settle down. You may not always be content, but you have more peace of mind about yourself, where you've been and where you're going.
Right now, you focus on taking care of Blaire. Getting your degree. Putting yourself first---so ditching the dude was SMART!! Because if he's not gonna take care of you, then you have to.
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