cold.

I really don't like the cold weather, it makes me sad and makes me think about a lot of nonsense. I hate it when I think too much about something because I tend to kinda get myself all bummed out. I stress about a lot of unnecessary things that I shouldn't even be worrying about in the first place. I am just completely ready for this semester to be over and have a little break from school. I completely hate my job and I don't really know. I just need a break. I need to get a way for a while like go somewhere away from friends and family and the stresses of the world. I just want to be completely happy. I can honestly say I haven't been that way in longer than I can remember. Things are good now but they could be better. I know that that is just a part of life and I need to get used to it. But I can honestly say I miss the days when I had nothing to worry about. I went to school came home and hung out. I didn't have to go to work everyday I didn't really have homework to do and things were just good. Summers seemed soooo long, I would almost do anything to have my childhood days back. Summers were incredibly fun then. I miss it.
My first love. Waking up early, staying out late. Swimming all day long with no worries. Going to the lake every weekend... Sigh.
If I could turn back time I surely would. I do not know what that would achieve because if I turned back time I would still have to grow up again. I would still go through all the pain and heartbreak that I've already gone through. Lord knows I don't want to put myself through all that over again. NO.
I'm unsure of many things right now. I realize I am completely rambling and keep saying "I" but my heart feels really heavy and I'm not sure what to say or how to feel. I kinda want to cuddle up under some nice warm fuzzy covers and lay there and listen to pretty music. Imogen Heap, that would be nice right now.